Writing this book has been a difficult task – its caused me to rehash a lot of emotions and really dig into how I feel about my diagnosis. But, even though it was difficult – it’s not half as difficult as thinking about what will happen after the book is published.
What if no one likes it?
What if all of my reviews are bad?
What if I help absolutely no one on their journey?
WHAT IF I FAIL?
These negative thoughts can weigh you down and eat at your very existence. Although I struggle to keep on the positive perspective of writing the book and the blog – part of me is always terrified of failure. But today, well today I’m attempting to approach this from another perspective. This time, with a little help from Mary Fran (aka FrannyCakes) new website – the Chronic Positivity Project. Her latest entry rocks.
So when I thought about how many books I wanted to order for myself, instead of being overwhelmed with the thought that I might die alone, crushed by the weight of my unsold books collecting dust on the shelves, with cats slowly eating away at my body – I WAS AWESOME INSTEAD.
I thought of one of my favorite scenes from the movie TROOP BEVERLY HILLS. Now, if you grew up in the late 80′s early 90′s like I did, hopefully you remember this gem of a movie. Well, I thought about the part where Troop Beverly Hills is ordering their boxes of cookies for the season.
(CLICK ON THE PICTURE TO OPEN IN YOUTUBE)
I’m going to pull a Troop Beverly Hills and order a ton of books. Seriously. And I have full faith that I will sell them all and they will be amazing and people will love them. Granted, they are not Thin Mints, but I am loving what I wrote and I am so proud of myself.
I am learning not to let fear and anxiety ruin my happiness. I won’t let it ruin this milestone for me. This is all me, and all awesome.